Potatoes Have Eyes | Frankology 82

One time, my gardener nearly broke the door off my shed. The door was mounted so it opens to the outside as opposed to inward. Unorthodox but necessary due to space constraints. Point is, this man was wholly unable to reason this and so tried to force the door off its hinges.

Another time, my company which manufactures glass partitioning, received via our website-contact-form a request from a woman about her mobile phone contracts. Apparently, she wanted to cancel one of them, and “continue only with the other one.” I can only assume our logo and that of the phone company are similar…

I read somewhere this morning the internet now has 3.6 billion users. The likes of Google processes 40 000 searches every second. That is a lot of users and a lot of user names. We should take two-thirds of them back.

How is it a good idea to allow anyone with the cognitive ability of a potato to use the internet; potatoes have eyes right, this must qualify them? Do you think these people are allowed to drive? Can they feed themselves? They are allowed to vote, this we know. Now we have given them user names and passwords, the means to spread their fucking idiotic brain-farts.

If you think the earth is flat, then I wish I did too, for just a moment, a moment long enough to take you to the edge of it and boot your thick fucking head over it. You are a waste of space and clutter an otherwise beautiful thing.